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Something I think people don’t realize, is when something negative
is being said, not only is the person who is the object of the
comment being harmed but the people participating in the exchange
go away with an unpleasant feeling, that stays with them for a
long while. Buz Orengo, of Station 48, once professed that “Hatred
is like a hot coal, the one carrying it around is burning their
own hand, all they have to do is let it go and the pain stops”.
Buz went on to say that, “The reason why positive thoughts and
speech are to be preferred and encouraged over negative ones is
that, negative thoughts and speech lead to suffering and painful
experience, whereas positive ones lead to harmony for all involved”.
When the morning conversation starts the day off filled with negative
energy, one can feel their mood set for the rest of the day.
These mind sets also are carried home and effect our relations
with loved ones. Watch civilians at a function when firefighters
start to converse about what they perceive to be life in the firehouse.
So not only are these resentments causing wedges to be driven
in the workforces, splintering firefighters into groups but it
also hinders a harmonious feeling, in general, for those who chose
to carry these negative emotions and pass them on constantly.
We are not mean spirited people, I truly believe it is a communication
style that has been developed over the years. Buz referred to
the fact that before he speaks the thought, what am I trying to
accomplish with my speech, proceed his words. Is it to defend
myself, is it to get even, or is it just to reach out and connect?
It gives our speech a whole new meaning. Think what a pleasant
surroundings the work place would be if people only spoke consciously
about and to one another, it’s what makes Buz so happy all the
time and so pleasant to be around. And as Buz always says “Those
Who Gossip With You, Gossip About You”! |
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